I ran into Humu Kon Tiki reader Tongodeon this weekend at Forbidden Island’s anniversary party (WHICH WAS FABULOUS), and he was handing out these great little Jack Chick-style tracts, warning of the assault on Christian values by the scourge of Tiki. The booklet has a reprint date of 2002, but I don’t know when it was originally created; it says it’s published by Thaniel Dickson Ministries, Inc., but a Google on that name only matches to a site that keeps track of Jack Chick parodies. Tongodeon bought a mess of them at a table at the Alternative Press Expo in San Francisco this past weekend.
I feel terrible for having led so many sheep astray over the years here at Humu Kon Tiki, sending innocents into morally corrupt lives of Martin Denny and Suffering Bastard worship. Perhaps it is not too late, and some of you can be saved. The tract instructs, “Most Importantly: Pass this message on to others !!!”, and because I love you so much, I am sharing this important message with you. You can view the entire tract at Humuhumu’s Life in Photos.
- TIKI – a Jack Chick-style Tract [Humuhumu's Life in Photos]












April 24th, 2007 at 4:36 pm
God bless you, Sister Humu. I’m going downstairs right now to break my mugs and flush my Velvet Falernum down the terlet!
April 24th, 2007 at 5:05 pm
Quite possibly the fastest bOINGbOINGing in history…:-)
April 24th, 2007 at 5:36 pm
Because I feel personally responsible for contributing to this scourge, I feel I must do more. Send me all your tiki paraphernalia, and I will burn it in a mighty pyre. From now on, devil rum will only be used to power our flames against Satan’s luau!
April 24th, 2007 at 5:58 pm
I was the one who handed you that tract. I can’t claim credit for it: I knew I was going to FI on Sunday, so on Saturday I bought about a dozen of them from the chick comics collector guy at the Alternative Press Expo.
April 24th, 2007 at 6:01 pm
You get credit for helping to spread the good word, Brother Tongodeon. Thanks so much for sharing this with me!
April 24th, 2007 at 8:53 pm
There are actually a whole series of these books that have been around forever, you can buy them at http://www.chick.com.
April 24th, 2007 at 11:01 pm
I got it all wrong, I know it now. The pyres are burning out back and the wife and kids are drunk from the local lua, dansing in the light.
I humbly beseech you, stop it ! Stop The Madness ! It is only a matter of time before the ‘heads’ move further inland and curse our local homes with pinapple and mad floral shirts !
Only you, great humuhumu have the power to shift events before our good christian values are dashed forever !
April 25th, 2007 at 1:07 pm
Das Böse tanzt Hula…
Foto: Humuhumu
Jahrzehntelang wurden wir durch exotische bunte Cocktails und Hemden mit Blumenmustern geblendet, um den Dämonen der Hölle anheim zu fallen. Glücklicherweise hat ein unbekannter Autor die Wahrheit über die Tiki-Mod…
April 25th, 2007 at 2:01 pm
Jason, the ones for sale over at chick.com are the real deal (and are awesome in their own right), but this one is a parody. Thaniel Dirkson, please step forward!
Tarky, I’m afraid it’s too late for me, I am surely damned to the eternal hellfires. The good news: the fire dancers will be awesome, and the roast pig will be delicious!
April 25th, 2007 at 6:12 pm
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May 22nd, 2007 at 2:37 pm
I told my wife about this post – we’re both Christians. Her response: “Mmm-hmm… I’m sure there is a tract against eating ice cream, too.”
August 27th, 2007 at 6:44 pm
I Sa Moke Em Boo Dai Yay!!
I Sa Moke em Boo!!
I Went To Chinatown,
Way Down In Old Hong Kong,
To Get some Egg Foo Yung,
And Then I Heard A Gong.
A Ling Ting Tong,
Tryin’To Sing this Song,
Singing”I Sa Moke Em Boo Dai Yay!!
I Sa Moke Em Boo!!
First,it’s Tiki!!
Then,it’ll be something harder!!
Soon,your child will be wanting to wear a Tux
and start singing Bobby Darin’s”Beyond The Sea”!!!
Think about it!!Listen to the last line”Happy We’ll Be Beyond the Sea,
And Never Again,I’ll Go Sailing!!”.
Doesn’t that last line sound creepier than an evening with Christopher Walken and Sir Anthony Hopkins???!!!
“Happy We’ll Be Beyond The Sea”sounds like a bunch of young men and women
who are participating in”Mixed Bathing”together!!
Ooohh The Humanity!!
When Will It all End???
Tiki Must Be stopped!!!
A
October 8th, 2007 at 4:01 pm
I was given one of these in, I think, 98 or 99 by Otto. He said he did not know where it came from, someone had given him a stack. So it has been around for a while. Chick Tracts have influenced many. eXene (singer for X) got the title for “Beyond and Back” from a Chick Tract.