I’ve got a backlog of Tiki Travels to tell you about! Remind me to tell you about New Year’s Eve at Tiki-Ti, and the swell Sippin’ Safari event in Boston. But to get started, I went to Portland a bit more than a week ago…

It’s really quite silly it’s taken this long, but I finally made it to Thatch in Portland. Of course, the Portland tiki crowd can make any ol’ hole a blast, but Thatch is hardly any ol’ hole… I love this place. First off, it’s dark, and I’m a sucker for a nice, dark tiki bar. It’s not as dark as The Alibi, of course, but I think there are sensory deprivation chambers that are brighter than The Alibi. I digress…

Thatch in Portland

What light there is at Thatch is provided by a lineup (literally — I’d actually love to see the lamps scattered a bit more) of really beautiful lamps by Kahaka, and a mess o’ pufferfish. Appropriate for the home town of the Velveteria, the place is lined with velvet paintings of varying quality. There’s a reclining wahine behind the bar who looks lumpy in good ways (boobies!) and in bad ways (I couldn’t shake the notion that her cheeks looked disturbingly like some paintings of Santa Claus). But much of the velvet there is really quite good, even great.

Also: there’s a black velvet clown. At least the clown is obvious in its wrongness, and Portland is a place that prides itself on obvious wrongness, so it sort of works in that regard, but really it’d be happier in a new home.

Clam shell originally from Portland’s Kon-Tiki

As reported earlier on Humu Kon Tiki, there are pieces from the Portland Kon-Tiki (via the recently closed Jasmine Tree) throughout Thatch — the famous three cannibal tikis of course, but also scads of other, smaller pieces that are probably better showcased here than they ever were at the Jasmine Tree.

The sunken bar is rather cool. I chatted to one of the bartenders about what it’s like to work at a sunken bar — I thought it might make the bartenders feel at a disadvantage, but he told me he actually really enjoys the intimate feeling he gets when he’s chatting with customers seated at the bar. The seating throughout much of Thatch came from an old Armet & Davis Denny’s, and it fits quite nicely. I didn’t get to spend time in the raised hut at the back of Thatch, as it was taken over by a large group by the time we arrived, but it looks like someplace I could lose many a happy evening.

The bridge entryway over a water pool works fantastically as a transition from the outside world. The bridge amazingly has no railings, but there haven’t been any drunken spills into the pool yet. Owner Robert Volz says that the absence of a rail forces even drunk people to pay a bit more attention to what they’re doing.

London Sour

I had a London Sour, which was quite tasty. Overall, the selection of drinks looked pretty good (though I wouldn’t miss the “Donkey Punch” if it left the menu… ugh). We didn’t try the food, since we’d just come from dinner (meatloaf & potatoes au gratin at the Doug Fir — yum!).

The music! The music was all spot on — lovely Exotica. I don’t know exactly what the music mix was, as I was paying attention more to the conversation of my companions… but I take that as a good sign, that the music didn’t jar me with its inappropriateness. Thank goodness.

Huge mahalos to Thatch owner Robert Volz for showing us a grand time, and to Melintur, Tiki Mama, Kim, Trader Tiki, Trott, Erik & Michele for sharing yet another memorable tiki-scented evening with me. I’m already looking forward to my return in late July!

View of Thatch from behind a tiki’s bum

• Thatch, Portland [Critiki]
• Thatch, Portland, OR (bar) [Tiki Central]
• Thatch [Humuhumu's Life in Photos
• Jasmine Tree Tiki Decor Going to Thatch [Humu Kon Tiki]
• The Alibi, Portland [Critiki]
• Kon-Tiki, Portland [Critiki]
• Jasmine Tree, Portland [Critiki]

Hanford says Tiki Central is experiencing a wee temporal blip. You may have trouble accessing it — if that happens, you can still get there via:

http://tikiroom.dreamhosters.com

It should all be back to normal in a couple days.

Tiki-Kate’s Tiki Plate

Tiki-Kate posted these two plates on Tiki Central. They’re both marked Syracuse China (which was in Syracuse, New York, per khan_tiki_mon), but don’t have specific restaurant markings. Bosko has pointed out that it would be strange for a restaurant to create such elaborate designs for their plates and not include the name of the restaurant, and Sven Kirsten doesn’t recognize the graphics as being iconic of a particular restaurant. That points to these plates having been created for more generic use, either for sale to Polynesian restaurants, or for home use. Another possibility is that these were created as samples, but not produced on a large scale.

Whatever the back story, I think they’re gorgeous, especially this first one. Tiki mugs may be more elaborate, but the simple elegance of serveware produces some restrained but compelling designs. Food served on a plate like that must be instantly more delicious!

On a related note, I recently learned that El Polinesio in Havana, which started its life as a Trader Vic’s before the Cuban revolution booted Vic’s out and the government took over the restaurant, is nevertheless still using plates with a big ol’ Trader Vic’s logo — almost 50 years later!

Tiki-Kate’s Other Tiki Plate

• I Surrender! Where Is this Plate From? [Tiki Central]
• El Polinesio, Havana [Critiki]
• Trader Vic’s, Havana [Critiki]

Carve a Tiki Kit, from the collection of 1961surf

1961surf posted this little oddity on Tiki Central: it’s a kit for carving your own tiki, and appears to be from the ’60s or maybe ’70s.

On the plus side, it’s a tiki carving kit! On the downside… well, the example tikis are damned ugly. Plus side: world’s longest dash (”Easy ——— Fun!”). Down side: the only carving implement in the box is steel wool. It’s not so much carving a tiki, as it is chafing a tiki.

The rather lame contents

In addition to the lump o’ steel wool, the kit also came with a block, some linseed oil, and, uh… that’s about it. There’s an instruction sheet, but I don’t know what it says. Maybe it says “Go buy some real tools.” Regardless, it’s a very cool find!

• When is the last time you have seen one of these ? [Tiki Central]

Tiki bar by Wes Bailey

Tiki bar construction is a bit weird — it’s an effort to intentionally create something that looks a little haphazard, a little goofy, and frankly… a little ugly. Now of course, I find it beautiful — and you probably do, too — but you have to admit, it’s not likely to wind up in the pages of House Beautiful.

I just got a really nice email from a professional woodworker who normally specializes in a much more conventionally refined style, and was asked to create one of these delightful little monsters for the first time:

My name is Wes Bailey, and I am a furniture maker in Atlanta, GA. A few months back, a client came to me and requested that I design and build a Tiki Bar for his basemant renovation. I must confess that, at the time, I was woefully unaware of the well-established sub culture of the Tikiphile. So I did some internet research and came across your terrific site, which helped give me the requisite inspiration to deliver the goods! It turned out great, the customer loved it and hasn’t been sober since, so I view that as a real success.

I have to admit, it makes me warm & squishy. I get lots & lots of really wonderful emails along the lines of this one, and they always make my day… but this one is a favorite because, well, I just really like the bar he built. A lot of credit goes to the owner, who has done a great job decorating the room. But the bar itself is really nice, especially for a right-out-of-the-gate effort. Tikis: check. Not too clean in the design, but still with a sense of balance: check. Organic feel: check. I especially like the detour from the standard thatch roof: wood slats that look like they’ve been through a hell of a storm, and loved it. It floats my outrigger.

• Wes Bailey, Fine Craftsman

This message has been brought to you
by Bora Boris.

My buddy Bora Boris left this picture as a comment on my MySpace page.

Oh dear. That won’t do at all. I mean, a warm Ray’s Mistake is still a Ray’s Mistake, but still… that’s just a crime against fake nature. We’ll have to do something about that.

Mahalo for the friendly nudge, Bora Boris.

Critiki hits the road: Critiki Mobile

It’s not really quite finished — there are some more tweaks I want to make — but I think it’s close enough that I don’t feel right keeping it from the tiki-lovin’ travelin’ souls of the world.

Critiki Mobile: http://mobile.critiki.com

It’s primarily designed for the iPhone, because a) it’s a dead sexy piece of machinery, and b) it’s what I’ve got. My friend Rich helped me out by letting me poke around on his Treo, and it seems to work just dandy, but I haven’t a clue what issues might crop up on other devices.

It’s been a fun challenge as a designer and a UI programmer to create an interface that works in such a small space with limiting size and interaction constraints. I’m pretty pleased with what I was able to come up with. While he didn’t help me directly, I think I was able to channel some of the serious UI mojo of Hanford Lemoore. Anything I got right was likely inspired by my Hanford exposure, anything I got wrong is squarely on my shoulders.

Nearly everything you can do on the regular Critiki site, you can do on Critiki Mobile — you can search for tiki locations, read the descriptions, look at pictures, find other tiki places nearby, and of course you can take a gander at how locations have been rated. Now, you can even add your own critiki ratings while you’re still in the restaurant! Since it is a phone app, naturally dialing phone numbers takes just a touch, and it’s also hooked into the iPhone’s Google Maps app, which is just ridiculously convenient. Ooh de lally. It makes me want to hit the road.

I’ve also cleared a big ol’ backlog of wonderful photo submissions to Critiki over the past few months — easily a couple hundred new photos!

I’d love to hear your thoughts on Critiki Mobile — as I mentioned, there are some tweaks I want to make (including some fantastic suggestions from my friend Jory), but I’d like to get feedback from a few users before I embark on some of the final fine-tuning. While the development will continue to be focused on the glorious, ovary-quaking iPhone experience, I’d also like to hear how it works (or more significantly, doesn’t work) on other mobile web-enabled devices.

• Critiki Mobile

Time to wake up from a long summer’s nap… and this is just the sort of thing to get me hummin’ again!

Rendezvous in Okonkoluku
Waitiki

This gorgeous cover should help to answer your first question — “Is this cutesy moderne Exotica?” Nope. This album is a straight-on visit to classic Exotica. Most of the songs are new compositions, and they fit right in with the classics. Waitiki’s earlier album, Charred Mammal Flesh was a fun party album, and did a great job of showcasing Waitiki’s fun spirit and musical chops — but it didn’t really illustrate just how well these guys know classic Exotica. And they know Exotica.

Perhaps my favorite song on this new album is “L’Ours Chinois,” composed by Professah Humming Flower himself, Randy Wong. It’s just beautiful — I can easily picture this song being picked up for use on a film soundtrack. Another favorite of mine is “Cave of the Tarpon,” composed by The Mayor of Exotica, Tim Mayer. In a nod to Waitiki’s legendary kookiness, there’s the smooth-flavored song “Pineapple Lilt,” a tribute to the Molokai Bar at the Mai-Kai, with velvety vocals.

Listening to this album, I’m reminded about my favorite aspect of Waitiki: they bring this stuff to life. They’re a healthy reminder of where this music came from — lounges in Waikiki, where the intention was to entertain a small group of happy souls, on vacation, falling in love with each other, Mai Tais, and this music.

In a very cool and unusual move, Waitiki is also releasing this album on vinyl. The CD has room for more songs of course, but vinyl purchasers are rewarded with a song not available on the CD, “Akaka Falls.”

I simply cannot get enough of Waitiki — as a matter of fact, I am so in need of a proper Waitiki fix, that I’m on my way to the airport right now to see them…

• Rendezvous in Okonkuluku [Waitiki.com]

Now, there are so many really fantastic, interesting, awesome people who love tiki… but tiki is not immune from attracting the occasional nutjob.

It has already been widely reported that before (allegedly) killing Lana Clarkson, famed record producer and coiffure aficionado Phil Spector paid a visit to Trader Vic’s in Beverly Hills, where he downed some Navy Grogs. He was apparently a bit of a regular there. When he made his way to Dan Tana’s later in the evening, he tried to order a Navy Grog there, too (I wish I could have seen the confused look on the bartenders’ faces).

But now comes this tiki-flavored contribution from The Smoking Gun, a postcard sent by Phil Spector last year to a friend:

Postcard sent by Phil Spector (via The Smoking Gun)

from the collection of Cool Manchu

This is a promotional still photo from a 1960s film (I always forget which one) — it’s a great photo, and accordingly it really makes the rounds. The Polynesian restaurant backdrop has been matted out here, but you can still see that they’re sipping out of a Kneeling Hula Girl bowl, like those once used at Trader Vic’s. The back of the postcard is on the crude side, so I won’t post it here, but you can check it out on The Smoking Gun if you wish.

Yes, tiki speaks to everyone, even the sociopathic and the mousse-addicted.

UPDATE: Great minds think alike — Beachbum Berry also just made a Phil Spector post, but his is more useful than mine… he expounds on the glorious Navy Grog, and even tells you how you can make your own. Play safe though, kids — guns & rum don’t mix.

• Greetings From Phil Spector [The Smoking Gun]
• Trader Vic’s Kneeling Hula Girl Bowl Large [Ooga-Mooga]
• NO JURY IN THE WORLD WOULD CONVICT HIM [Grog Blog]
• BREAKING: Beverly Hills Trader Vic’s Has Closed - UPDATED [Humu Kon Tiki]

New Bartender at Tiki-Ti (dramatization)

A dramatic shift, and one that can’t help but make you do a spit-take… word on the street is that Tiki-Ti is training a new bartender.

I only have a few details, sent my way by a little bird who got to see the new bartender in action last Wednesday. He said the new bartender is named Mark, he isn’t a Buhen but rather the son of a longtime Tiki-Ti patron (he is a Buhen after all, see below for an update), and the Ray’s Mistake he made was good.

Tiki-Ti has been a family-run outfit: original owner Ray Buhen was the sole bartender for many years, until his son Mike started helping out; Mike’s son Mike came on the scene with the passing of Ray a few years ago. There are several reasons Tiki-Ti has been family-run:

1. Ray came from a world where your recipes were your currency, your strongest asset, and you sure as heck didn’t teach them to others who could then take them to the competition. Even today, the descendants of some of the original Don the Beachcomber’s bartenders have been so trained by their fathers on this point that they were still wary of showing any recipe notes to Jeff “Beachbum” Berry when he was writing his book on tiki cocktail hisotory, Sippin’ Safari. It’s likely that Ray Buhen felt that only his own family could be trusted with his recipes, and the sentiment has lived on.
2. The drink list at Tiki-Ti is extensive — mind-bogglingly so. And complicated. Even if they were comfortable letting another person in on the family secrets, getting them up to speed would be a daunting task, to be sure, and your average bartender frankly isn’t up to the task.
3. Smoking in bars is illegal in California — not to protect patrons, but to protect employees. Since Tiki-Ti is owner-operated, and thus has no employees, smoking is allowed. Mike & Mike are both smokers.

These three reasons are neat & all, but do they really counteract the plusses of having another bartender in the mix? What happens when Mike or Mike get sick? What happens if Mike or Mike would like, for once in their lives, to get to do something on a Friday or Saturday night? What happens if Mike or Mike decide that even though they really love Tiki-Ti, they want to follow their own dreams? They would certainly be entitled. And when push comes to shove, Mike & Mike just can’t run the bar alone forever and ever. There has to be a plan for either succession, or for closing Tiki-Ti. You can probably guess which of those two scenarios I’d rather see. So, while the news that they have a new bartender is a little shocking, it’s not entirely surprising, and it’s actually totally welcome.

What does it mean? Heck, I don’t know. You’ll have to ask Mike & Mike. It’s not likely that they’re going to give up smoking, so I suspect that they’ve made this new bartender part-owner. They’ve probably been training him for quite a while behind the scenes, and they’ll probably start him out just focusing on part of the drink menu initially. Those are just guesses on my part, though.

So, swing by Tiki-Ti and give a warm welcome to Mark!

UPDATE: I just chatted with Tiki-Ti regular Miles Thompson and got more info: Mark is a Buhen, he’s Mike’s son and Mike’s brother. That makes oh-so-much-more-sense, and is wonderful news.

• Tiki-Ti
• Tiki-Ti [Critiki]
• Sippin Safari [Amazon.com]

Michael, photo by Biotron2000

Fulton Burley, who was the voice of Michael the Irish Parrot at the Enchanted Tiki Room, passed away this past Monday at the age of 84.

Wait, wait, we forgot to wake up the glee club!

Burley was better known for his many performances as the host and master of ceremonies at the long-running Golden Horshoe Revue. Burley was honored as a “Disney Legend” in 1995. He was married to his wife Terry for an amazing 62 years, until she passed this past January.

Laughing Place has a nice, long tribute, with quotes from his performing partner Wally Boag. [via The Disney Blog]

• Legendary Golden Horseshoe Performer Fulton Burley Passes Away [Laughing Place]
• Disneyland Golden Horseshoe Performer Fulton Burley Passes Away [The Disney Blog]
• The Enchanted Tiki Room, Anaheim [Critiki]

Tiki in front of Disneyland’s Adventureland Bazaar, from Daveland

Dave over at Daveland just posted this neat photo taken in Disneyland’s Adventureland in June 1958. This is the most traditional tiki I think I’ve ever seen at Disneyland, it’s pretty cool. I believe that when this picture was taken, Eli Hedley would have been running the Adventureland Bazaar which is right behind the tiki, and he may have been responsible for procuring this tiki. That’s just a wild guess, though.

• Bazaar (or bizarre) Tiki [Daveland]

Chin Tiki, photo by Feelin’ Zombified

It’s been a while since my last update about the Chin Tiki in Detroit. It’s been a very, very long time since Chin Tiki was operational — 1980 — but all the interiors were still there sitting unused in the decades that followed, leading locals to hope that perhaps Chin Tiki’s days were not quite over. But Marvin Chin died last year, and I believe much of the decor was sold or moved to his son’s restaurant, Chin’s in nearby Livonia.

The parking lot surrounding Chin Tiki had been sold years ago to Ilitch Holdings, and in February of this year, they took deed of the restaurant building, too. According to The Detroit News, Ilitch Holdings has been quietly purchasing other properties in this desolate area of Detroit, leading to speculation that there may be plans to build a new hockey arena — Mike Ilitch owns the Detroit Red Wings. Even if a hockey arena isn’t the ultimate outcome, it appears likely that the Chin Tiki building is destined to be razed for a larger development — developers don’t buy up four blocks of contiguous land because they really like the sidewalks.

• Ilitches’ downtown power play [The Detroit News]
• Chin Tiki in Detroit: An Update [Humu Kon Tiki]
• Chin Tiki, Detroit [Critiki]

Aku Aku slot machine,
from the collection of AkuAku

This slot machine was posted today on Tiki Central. It came from the Aku Aku restaurant that was part of the recently-demolished Stardust Casino (Aku Aku closed many years earlier, in 1980). It’s a little hard to tell, especially with this paint job, but this slot machine is in the shape of a moai. You pull one of the ears to play, and there’s a stern little mouth above the payout dish — too bad it doesn’t pay through the nose (har, har!).

The poster, appropriately named AkuAku, is looking for more information about this slot machine — especially its original paint job, so that it can be restored. He said this was likely placed within the Aku Aku restaurant, and sat on a stand of some sort. Loose Change Magazine apparently called it “the World’s ugliest slot machine,” and I won’t argue that — it’s definitely not a looker. But beauty isn’t everything, and this sucker is cool — I haven’t been so tickled to see an Aku Aku souvenir since I saw that extra-fancy moist towelette. Mr. Bali Hai is on the hunt tho help AkuAku learn more; hopefully we’ll get to see pictures of this in restored condition someday.

• Aku Aku - 1960 Stardust Slot machine [Tiki Central]
• Aku Aku, Las Vegas [Critiki]
• Nothing Says “Fancy” Like a Moist Towelette [Humu Kon Tiki]

Dallas Trader Vic’s

Dallas Trader Vic’s

Well, with all this sad news about Trader Vic’s lately, how about a little celebration of Trader Vic’s at its best? If you’re in the Dallas area, tonight’s your night. Well, any night is your night — you’re lucky enough to have what is possibly the most beautiful Trader Vic’s in the United States right in your town.

About 25 Texas-area tikiphiles are gathering at the Dallas Trader Vic’s tonight for drinks and dinner. They’re meeting in the bar at 5pm, and planning on dinner at 7pm. It’s a friendly bunch, and if you’ve been wanting to meet other tikiphiles in your area, this is a perfect opportunity. They’ve got a roll call going at Tiki Central to get a rough head-count, but don’t let that hold you back — there’s always room at the bar if the dinner table is full.

The Dallas Trader Vic’s is at the Hotel Palomar, at 5300 E. Mockingbird Lane.

• Texas tikiphile gathering at Dallas Trader Vic’s May 5th, 2007 [Tiki Central]
• Trader Vic’s Dallas
• Trader Vic’s, Dallas [Critiki]